My child is not friends at school

Arbor

  • nude04/18/2012 at 15:15:24
    My child is not friends at school ...
    Daughter --9. He says that no one is friends with her. If there is an opportunity to sit down as the children want - no one sits down to it. Segoldday came, crying ... Communication problems for a long time. Even in the garden paid attention to it. I have it very impressionable, with complexes, lives with emotions. For the girlfriend "fall tear", but children do not appreciate it. And when she is thrown into trouble by the one for whom she has just fought - the end of the world. Yes, it is unpleasant, but docha steps on the same rake a hundred times a day ... That is, again he goes to intercede the next day for the same girlfriend and then cries again. And I talked to her and was thinking about transferring to another school (although I really understand that the problem is in my child). Well, sho do? Or will it pass? Will wisdom come with age?
    • everything will be fine04/19/2012 at 23:48:24
      here advised http://adalin.mospsy.ru/l_04_03.shtml
    • cat04/20/2012 at 13:40:39
      why didn't you pay attention to it before? (4-5 years

      ... the nurse deigns to drink beer after a busy day. QUIETLY SHA SHAH ALL !! (c) PtaXa
      Tech support is a service that gives advice on what to do after stepping on rakes. Usually her first advice is to step on the rails again and compare the sensations.

      • nude04/20/2012 at 2:32:21 PM
        Not before that we had. In the garden she +
        almost did not go. She was very sick. She had so many diagnoses that I considered this problem as a minor. Maybe this is the reason.
    • dashylia_88804/19/2012 at 19:53:10
      Transfer your daughter to another school
      I translated my child, she was with the manger with them, well, that didn’t work out + the first teacher didn’t love her, told me that your girl is not fixable, no one is friends with her and the problem is with her, and I thought that my problem as a child, and when she transferred to another school, as it turned out to be a problem and not a problem, the whole class is friends with her !! And they invite to the DR and call up. Thank God for 6 years and I don’t regret the transfer at all.
      And the candy is not in order to be friends with her.

      I am proud that I am a mom!
      ( /)
      ( . .)
      c ('') ('')

      • barmaleyka04/21/2012 at 2:17:05 PM
        I agree .. It is possible that
        teacher somehow provoked this attitude to his daughter.
    • Artcat04/19/2012 at 16:43:48
      Judging by the written, the world consists of girls, traitors and your crystal loyal daughter. This a priori can not be so. +
      Take a look a little more distantly. Do you have obsession, tediousness, excessive pradolyubiya, the desire to "privatize" her friend, to protect her from all. So look for kids is important.You can dress the child with taste and very well, but among children it can be considered too childish, unfashionable, "uncool"
    • Goldilocks04/19/2012 at 14:04:32
      maybe the teacher humiliated the child for all?
      how does she study? Children at that age depend on the teacher's opinion. If the teacher has a negative attitude to the child, then the rest of the children too.
      • nude04/19/2012 at 16:35:07
        I do not even know. I have a teacher tattered from head to toe ...
        Yes, and it is adequate (teacher). Docha speaks normally to her teacher.
    • Natalia04/21/2012 at 13:51:00
      I'll say an unpleasant thing now +
      the author, the problem is in you. The worldview of the child is a reflection of the worldview of the parents. As long as the parents do not change themselves, the child will have problems (these problems will accompany him even in adulthood, if the brains do not turn on). If a child has trouble with peers, then it's time for parents to change their attitude towards others, towards themselves. Such problems are never solved by “offhand”, it is a long, multifaceted and hard work. To brush aside or to deny the problem will not work - life will bring its own correctives.
      Each has its own "cockroaches". It’s just that at some particular time these “cockroaches” crawl out, pointing us to something in our life that requires changes :))
      • barmaleyka04/21/2012 at 2:15:34 PM
        I just want to ask ...
        Where is the line between the parental ... self, perhaps, and the child's personality? To what extent do parents have to bend down in their outlook for the benefit of children? I agree that much is reflected in the child. But does the mother really have to bend like rubber to child? I explain how I can .. if, say, a mom is an i-rovert .. Well, I have such a freak. Or, due to circumstances, avoids intercourse. Do you have to change yourself for the sake of children?
        • Natalia04/22/2012 at 15:55:29
          it is not about the child’s trough +
          parents should not bend under the needs of the child. This is a problem analogy. Child problems point to similar problems for parents in their personal adult lives. The challenge is to see this analogy. Often diametrically opposed views, behaviors have a single root.
      • Lesa04/21/2012 at 13:58:11
        If possible, please give an example of such a "cockroach". ()
      • Fayna04/21/2012 at 16:51:37
        Haha, tell it to mothers of many children. All children are different, despite the same cockroaches from their parents)))

        Life by 10% consists of what happens to us and 90% of how we react to it.

        • Julia04/22/2012 at 01:44:46
          +100 just wanted to write it !!!
          Do not hang the author of the guilt complex.
          I have not yet had a third, bonus childless child, I couldn’t find anything in myself ...
        • polenka04/22/2012 at 2:32:02 PM
          Yes, initially different. But if the mother herself does not know how to build relationships, and the child doesn’t naturally know how, from whom will he learn?
          then she will learn by herself when she grows up ...
          My youngest did not know how, but watched me very carefully and studied with me :-)

          "My wings left no trace in the sky, but I do not grieve - I know that I flew."
          Rabindranath Tagore

          • Fayna04/22/2012 at 16:16:35
            yes, there should be a good example, but not all children are capable of adopting this example.

            Life by 10% consists of what happens to us and 90% of how we react to it.

    • Julia04/18/2012 at 23:23:43
      According to your description is very similar to my daughter
      only she is not persistent in friendship, but on the contrary, everything is waiting for when she will be paid attention to. And older. A "very impressionable, with complexes, lives with emotions" - 100% mine, and the problems are the same.
      If you want, write to the mail or give mail, there is something to share.
    • Natalia04/22/2012 at 15:57:34
      it is not about the child’s trough +
      parents should not bend under the needs of the child. This is a problem analogy. Child problems point to similar problems for parents in their personal adult lives. The challenge is to see this analogy. Often diametrically opposed views, behaviors have a single root.
    • meyjey_4you04/18/2012 at 23:09:31
      look for friends in the yard, explain and communicate with the child constantly, she needs your support like no one and never now
      time will pass and everything will be shredded. it will fall into place, the main thing is not to give up. If you are in a very tight situation, connect a psychologist
    • 04/18/2012 at 15:37:56
      The author, how do you understand wisdom? The one that comes with age? (+)
      Do you explain to the child its intrinsic value, and not the value of what “breaks for a girlfriend”? The fact that all its current troubles - in the future seem imaginary, atoms and completely forgotten?
      That friendship "excitedly" is not an integral attribute of a student ?! And what if the child is interesting to himself, then the friendship with him will be interesting to others?
      • nude04/18/2012 at 15:47:33
        That's the thing +
        What I explain. Wisdom, maybe I bent it, but I also work with children and I see that for others, wisdom is simply “adult”.Someone just cunning. And someone (such a minority) out of work: (
    • sveto4ka04/28/2012 at 19:18:45
      I think the ability to make friends is very important how much a person can "look into the soul"
      do not break for a girlfriend, namely, to feel. This is what I mean, the fact that touchy people, as a rule, cannot do it. If you write that the daughter is touchy (and you?), Then you need to work with this.
    • aterpil04/18/2012 at 5:05:49 PM
      IMHO, proving to the other children how good you are is absolutely useless. +
      All these candies, pupae are not friendship, they begin to use the child, they first eat candies, then they drive to the dining room: “Oh, could you buy a pie, otherwise I don’t have time,” “please bring me a bag from the office, but then I will not have time to go to the toilet ", etc. - unless I want my daughter to become gradually an errand girl. Such a person is in any company, and he, by the way, is also a necessary person, but does your daughter need this?
      Until the child understands that he is good in itself, that there’s no need to “tear up” anyone, that he is an interesting, talented, blah blah blah person who surrounds this, too, will not see.
      I am now looking for girls in the sixth grade - their roles have already been distributed. There are two stars who lazily fight each other for first place and popularity, each star has its own team of girlfriends who cannot be friends with the enemy side.This team just includes children who want to be friends at any cost. And the stars choose - with whom to go home today, with whom to sit at the desk, by the way, it can be a shame to tease and put girlfriends into the room, singing along. And there are several girls who are friends with everyone, do not enter into coalitions and do not strive, they do not bend under the cool fashion. Nobody teases them, they do not ask for a file-bring, but everyone is friends with them and respects them. And the stars, after several fruitless attempts to draw into their teams, communicate with them on an equal footing, but without competition and dirty tricks. In general, try to get into the third group :)
      • nude04/18/2012 at 17:13:18
        Oho-ho ... We will try ...
      • wasabi04/19/2012 at 06:05:23
        and is there somewhere to read about this scenario, but that was described literary?
        so that the child is interesting to read?
        I would be very grateful for the ideas.
        thanks for your opinion (very much the same as mine)
        • aterpil04/19/2012 at 15:03:16
          We recently bought a vaunted two-volume book "What if?" - as a gift, but we looked neatly :)
          There is an article “What to do if you guys are teased” and “What to do if no one is friends with you” - well, briefly, with pictures. We have already passed the stage, but the book is very good.
          And I, in my own words, pronounced it all, starting at the age of six. She brought her girlfriends as an example, whom she met in high school and college. She asked if she remembers the children with whom she played in the sandbox three years ago, whether their opinion is important now. I myself think that more or less normal friends appear along with freedom of movement and personal interests, so it was easy to explain.
          • Julia04/19/2012 at 23:59:40
            Enlighten, please, about the two-volume book
            I found a book by Petranovskaya on the Internet with that title, but everywhere 1 book is that it? maybe published in one volume? if in real life you buy, please tell me where it is very important to us.
            OFF And what do I need in the Internet to request "What to do if" is already a special topic))))))
            • aterpil04/27/2012 at 1:26:12 PM
              There are two books in the publishing house Avanta +
              "What if," and "What if, 2". The first - for the younger, the second - for the older. Questions of friendship - in the first.
              I bought from Miroslav, look at the site.
              • Julia04/28/2012 at 18:00:40
                Thank!
          • wasabi04/21/2012 at 12:00:34
            thanks for the answer. and in the internet somewhere like this did not come across?
            I have many sites of the CIS countries fall out on a timeout, I can not really google
            thank
    • Panda_1304/18/2012 at 16:29:29
      Mine also complained, although it turned out to be exaggerating the problem, but this is what I advised her
      To set the tone for something, to introduce to the class new hobbies, new fashion, new magazines, new ones, some things that the kids have theirs.
      For example, I bought her a beautiful book-form, and the small one carried her to school, her classmates started filling her out, my daughter got to know better about her classmates' hobbies and at the same time the kids started copying her, also bringing questionnaires.
      Then the small one introduced fashion to colored laces, leggings, then to hairstyles, then to magazines. There were common themes, hobbies, conversations, and so on.
      Children are still inclined to exaggerate and dramatize, as I understood, maybe not so awful ...
    • cheese04/18/2012 at 18:45:29
      what to do - look for your niche, your chip
      Plus to the advice of Panda_13.
    • juli2704/18/2012 at 7:24:27 PM
      Correctly think transfer to another school will help
      My similar was, but not so neglected case. I was very afraid, but translated. Now the old girlfriend from the previous school squeaks right behind her (before that, everything threatened that she would not be friends), her daughter has many new friends, a new social circle.
      If possible, find a school where children go to grade 5 from different schools.According to interests (mathematical or humanitarian). This will be another team. Perhaps the daughter will be more comfortable there and she will find girlfriends for herself.

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  • My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

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    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

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    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

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    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school

    My child is not friends at school